BITCHES GET STUFF DONE

 

 

A few months ago I did an interview for the Sun regarding my 'involvement' in the McCann case.  The interview was about the internet and trolls. I have had nearly 8 years of being slandered, threatened, abused and occasionally been encouraged to end it all, so I thought feck it, I finally have the chance to show the watching world (I hoped) that I wasn't in fact a two headed beast pounding out vitriol about a grief stricken family from the backroom of a grimy bedsit. 

Thus preacheth Tony Bennett

I said quite a lot of words when I gave the interview, but the one that stood out in the minds of the Sun headline skimmers, Tony Bennett and a large percentage of the fruitloop antis was the word 'Bitch'.  The 'pros' were of course too busy laughing - and it was a fair cop, they had just cause.  And fair dues on the Sun editors too, supply and demand and all that and the word 'bitch' is always pretty reliable. The public however didn't bat an eyelid, the only threats and messages of hate I received came from antis claiming I had devastated the cause and blackened their names.  It was as if I had eaten the last cake that they all had their eye on.

In the eyes of the middle class white men running this case (on both sides) we must all listen with mother and stand when the National Anthem comes on.  The idea that women, and confident, attractive ones at that, should be running the Investigation and the making of a documentary, is an effrontery that has wedged those tiny whities right up their arses.  The lead detective has flowing blonde locks and paints her nails.  WTF! Stop the press, drop the Royal baby, unless a woman has the mind of an antiquated bishop and the face of Anne Widdicombe, she should never be taken seriously! 

Anyway, back to that Sun article.  Trying to explain that you are not a lunatic can unfortunately have the opposite effect, and I speak from experience so I should have known better.  But I was once told by a soothsayer that I'd make the middle pages of said red top, so I had to give it a shot.  Fortunately, for the world, the photographer insisted I kept my top on, but I might as well have for all the uproar that followed. 

Just to be clear, I was speaking for myself, I was not speaking on behalf of all those who have taken it so personally, those who's lives have been ruined by sharing the same non belief in the McCanns as myself.  I have never hidden behind anonymity, ergo, I have taken the full force of Team McCann retribution.  None of those protesting have, their 'real' lives have remained unaffected.  Whilst I am flattered these scaredy cats 'appointed' me their spokesperson, I didn't and nor did the article. I take nooooooo responsibility for any of the actions of the antis, as groups or individuals.  I've signed none of their Petitions and I've joined none of their secret groups.  I find what some of them do, and what they have done, morally corrupt, they have literally become (or were they always?) a pack of vigilantes meddling with an official police investigation by intimidating and harassing innocent witnesses. And, just for the record, I have never had any desire to be part of a mob, especially an angry one, because, and I cannot stress this enough, I despise mob mentality. 

 This case has attracted some of the worst of humanity, most of them posing as righteous, indignant, beacons of virtue and regular screamers of 'think of the children'.  People, who, for whatever reason are terrified of their identities being revealed.    

So what did I do that put me on par with Myra Hindley and Lucretia Borgia?  I admitted that I enjoy, actually to be precise, that I get a buzz from the 'verbal' jousting on twitter!  Shock, horror, prepare the bonfire, lol, actually, stoke it up, cause I've got more to add.  What I like about twitter is that it is a bit like Fight Club - the rule is, there are NO RULES.  And why on earth should there be?  Twitter is all about words, and unlike sticks and stones, they don't break your bones.  OK, occasionally some twisted fuckheads will come out with freaky stuff, but when you understand that the problem is coming from freaky sender, not you, you can deal with it rationally.  And enough laws already exist to round them up.

Why is it necessary to have a noble cause to promote in order to justify spending time on twitter?  Why must we pretend it is a chore, or something we have to squeeze in between deconstructing the Gettysburg Address and putting the washing on? Why can't we acknowledge we enjoy twitter for what it is?  It's fun ffs!  A bit like a funfair ride if you are on a particularly feisty hashtag.  For the first time in history, we, the plebs, can interact with - hell just about anyone, even the Pope!  We can tell our local MP he/she is a twat (and get escorted off the premises) and we can tell people like Stephen Fry, Russell Brand, Nicola Sturgeon and Callum Best how fab they are and Hugh Grant that his last film sucked.  Its a great leveller, and its impossible to keep a secret.  Maybe that's the problem, and the reason why Richard Madeley demands protection (from what?) and Grace Dent whines on about the lawless internet.  Those who demand others only say nice things about them, will have as much success with that as they will in the real world.  I wish them well and hope their heads get better.  Incidentally, it is only the completely witless and charmless who need it written into the statutes.

Sadly for those who wanted me stoned (not in a fun way), the public thrashing simply didn't happen.  Complete strangers wrote to me out of the blue, even pro's were sending me private messages and offers of kind shoulders and sympathy.  I found so many friends I never knew I had, and it restored my faith in human nature over and over.  Sadly, it also sorted the wheat from the chaff, and the sinister agendas from the genuine ones - ce la vie.  The Sungate episode was extremely enlightening, it showed how some people read what they want to, and not what is written.  Which might of course explain a certain person's poor research and conclusions. 

And speaking of Mr. Bennett and his barmy fixation with bitches: