Wednesday 28 March 2012

LITTLE BOXES PART II

Strangely, I have only fond memories of the old YGL and the boards that preceded, and couldn't help but wonder what the feck it was that kept drawing us back there again and again.  I pretty much knew I had an addiction, but having much therapy, I decided to forgive myself for it, and spare any other poor sod the agony of having listen to me waffling on, even if they were getting paid an exhorbitant hourly rate.  I was also much too humane to inflict it on the few friends I had left.  When son and I were discussing Orwell's 'Room 101', son suggested myself reading passages from my book.  He has a very cruel sense of humour that boy. I think that might make Annie laugh though.    

When I arrived on the board, I blatantly announced myself as a Marxist/Feminist, I felt sure it would cause a bit of a stir, and I was delighted it did.  I had tried a couple of other AOL boards, but they had scared the bejesus out of me.  I always went to YGL when there was breaking news, and yeh, friendship.  Actually, truth be told, I liked the company, and familiarity, even if if it often was with daggers drawn,  I was in shock at the sheer anger and hostility that oozed from the cesspit it became.  I jest, it was quite nice at the beginning.  The lovely Lisa made me roar with laughter on a Maddy thread when she said 'some of us haven't hoovered since May'!  I was a late arrival, but immediately felt at home. 

I also felt exhilerated.  I knew if I felt like having a laugh, there would be someone else online who also had the giggles.  It was also a place to throw out random thoughts and find other crazy people who had similar interests. It was a place to rant and rave, knowing that someone would read it, and the feel the way that we did, and if they didn't, it was great fun arguing about it. 

But then you have the 'deh, deh, deh' roll of drums, as the baddies emerge, shouting 'order, order,' we must get things under control.  I think the discussing of potting sheds was seen as 'un-european' and therefore off topic, and swearing and cussing was going to be graded for severity, maybe 5000 report key hits for a c*nt, down to 200 or so if you forget how to spell feck.  Therein began the great censorship wars of 2008, the point, I feel where the board divided, a bit like the yankies and the confederates.  Sides were taken, loners were eaten alive, or spat out to be toyed with another day. 

Social boundaries were torn down, the gloves were off.  No blow was too low, no subject too taboo.  Posters were accusing those who survived the first barrage of abuse and suspicion, of the foulest crimes imaginable. Real mental health issues were scorned, seen as a sign of weakness, a tool with which to batter the confessors.   

Rules were made to be obeyed, 'we don't want your lefty sort here' was the battlecry of the self appointed guardians of our morals.  Talking about inner thoughts, insecurities or weaknesses, became strictly taboo.  There have been times when I have sensed posters inner pain and fear of sharing it because of inevitable repercussions.

I began to see the place as Animal Farm, complete with all the requisite pigs and dog pack.  Hmmm, will have to have a re-read of that and keep you posted after I have designated roles.  I will let the reader decide. 

But back to the original board.  I am still trying to figure out why we kept returning and returning.  Some of us clearly hated each other.  The nicer, more mentally stable of the visitors who passed through on the way, and were strong enough to resist the lure of an old fashioned Corrie street fight, got out while they were still sane and only dipped a toe in occasionally to see if the loonies were still ruling the asylum.  For a long time they were.



To be continued.............

15 comments:

  1. Hey Cristobell. You, probably. returned to the YGL board for the same reason many others did, as you had grown familiar with the board's other patrons, knew what to expect and, indeed, understood that it was an inconsequential non-threatening environment the return visits to which - petty disagreements with those whose boasts about themselves were unsupported by the reality of their embarrassingly insubstantial YGL presence notwithstanding - instilled a sense of safety and comfort that many derive from a set routine and exposure to that with which they are familiar. You knew that, upon signing on to the YGL board, you would be in the company of friends as well as the wickedly dense, ammonia-leaking punctured gasbags and transparently dishonest posters, unprincipled, unethical and utterly bereft of reason and the ability to conduct themselves with dignity and honour in a dialogue that challenged their beliefs and routinely dismantled their spurious arguments, mocked their insipid diversionary tactics and expressed disgust at their inability to concede a point.
    Many of the YGL posters were brittle OAPs in body with a mind as blank as that of an infant.
    Hitch4557

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  2. Hahahaaha...I was just going to say I enjoyed your blog..yet again...and yes sons can be cruel..but we love them regardless..when I saw Hitch say..

    "Many of the YGL posters were brittle OAPs in body with a mind as blank as that of an infant"

    hahahaha...that made me laugh even harder...we OAP'S-- have much to contribute to those who "think" they have something interesting to say... 99.9% of the posters (not just OAP's) think Hitch is a boring fart...yep! he/she can talk..but it isn't interesting..it's like treading mud and wwhen you eventually think there is an end to it, there's only more mud to tread.(dusts hands and dusts Hitch right outta my hair)
    Bell we went back because it was company...much of the time it was interesting...quite a lot of laughs..the odd fight where we settled down with a cuppa and a hot cross bun or family size pkt of maltesers..and it was as good a time as lying in the sun on the beach in the Greek Islands..(ok I went too far there but you get the gist) it was only when the darn right NASTY SADISTIC fights and arguments happened it became HORRID or at the very least uncomfortable...but the minute we knew the boards were going we fell apart and became frantic..why? well we depended on each other 24/7 at times..didn't matter when you went on the YGL board there was always someone to chat with...usually between 3am-5am Notts was there doing her voodoo posts that were hard to read..but if you had had a handful of valium and were really desperate and could catch her attention you were quids in then too ..but it was like an old favourite book you picked up and knew all the characters and sometimes even knew what they would say before you asked a question...the best of it was it was fast moving..instant..now we're all nice to each other which is not unpleasant but it's just not the same but it's the best we have..and Inta's forum is amazing...a lot of work has gone into it to keep many of us together (Applause to Inta) and Applause to the folks like yourself who have done some blogging...I like them..keep up the good work Bell, your different and a bit of a fruitcake but I luvs ya!

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    1. I disagree with you on Hitch. I think she is brilliant.

      On the board wars, yes, they were bizarre, yet compelling. I would come away feeling exhilerated, buzzing, pumped with adrenalin from the skirmish.

      It was a fantastic refuge, and as you say, it was contact with another human, even if the other human was obnoxious. It actually saved my local branch of the Samaritans getting a restraining order against me.

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  3. Bell.. I miss the ygl because it was there at the press of a button and without any mods... mmm pigs and dogs will be interested to hear who is who.. lol.. anyway Bell really enjoying reading your blog.. xx

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  4. By the way Bell as I have had a few glasses of wine and feeling silly.. I have to tell you I love your picture it says.. come up and see me sometime.. xx Sue R

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    1. Hi RSue, it is funny isn't it. The irony is I would never have been able to come up with something like that, so it was a double whammy!

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  5. Well I have to say this too.. I am having a drink because my chovanistic.. narsistic oh is home for 9 days from Saturday so while the cats away the mouse can play.. where was I.. I liked the ygl because I could esape from the boring dull day in day out things.. I could go there and find someone to talk to that made me feel alive.. and sometimes when I was sad there was always someone that could empathise.. and make me laugh.. but its gone now.. and all we are left with is private or mods like the netserve where one of the pigs complained about me and I was sort of banned.. they sent my posts to be reveiwed.. huh.. well that hurt me but I thought I am not so destperate that I need to be here with a load of people that cant bear to see a post from anyone that thinks different to them.. grrr.. anyway thats in the past now and the pig has her own blog.. hahaha.. have you read it.. its boooooring.. sorry Bell for maybe spoiling your blog saying this.. xx

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    1. Hey, I feel privileged that you are following my blog RSue and delighted that you are joining in.

      Now I will have to totally evalue my previous thoughts on why we kept going back, might just have been that most of us are crap with technology!

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  6. Noo Bell dont evaluate anything.. so far you got it just about reat.. I love piggies and I am an animal ativist.. totally against intensive farming of piggies and cows and sheep and all animals.. but I can make an exception to human pigs.. they are the crulest of all animals.. piggies in their own evironment are loving and look after their babies.. and they roll in the mud and like to play.. but human pigs are the opposite they are hitlers dream.. this space in time will go in history for the cruelty to our beautiful animals that we exploit and give nothing back to them.. I have no sympathy however for human pigs.. xx

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  7. Go you for being an animal activist. I totally support your cause. Wrong to make animals suffer through human greed.

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  8. Hell, I wish I could have a quid for every time I've asked myself that question, I would be swanning off to somewhere very exotic lol.

    Truth is Bell I never did get to suss out exactly what the draw was, I think part of the fascination for me was seeing what was for all intents and purposes intelligent women behaving like fish wives, me included, for the most part I tried hard to keep my dignity and as time went on I managed to curb the urge to utter profanities that would have had a navie blushing but there were times when I think I could have punched some posters if given the chance lol.

    The fairies got on my tits to be honest, there we were trying to have a reasoned intelligent debate about the why's & wherefores of the McCann case when up popped this group from gawd knows where and started talking about bloody potting sheds and daisies FFS, who were these mamby pamby twits trying to infiltrate OUR board, if I had had access to a sten gun I would have wiped the lot of them out lol.

    Sadly the debate side of it all just ran out of steam for me, we had dissected every piece of news & evidence there was and were still no nearer knowing what happened, some posters went way to far into some of the more unsavoury theories and to be honest I did actually wonder about their sanity, thats when I tried (emphasis on TRIED) to distance myself from it all but I did miss a lot of the posters there and just the general chit chat, it was familiar and when you saw a name you knew you also had a fair picture of their life and even though you hadnt met them you could empathise or sympathise with whatever was going on with them so there was a connection.

    It was a tough board to post on and definitely wasn't for the faint hearted and I think they pulled the plug at the right time, it wasn't a pleasant place to be right at the end and I'm glad of the chance to move on.

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    1. LOL Bev, I think we all turned into Ma Bakers at times, with our sten guns at the ready. And I was a bloody fairy, ha ha, at least I think I was.

      Beats me what the draw was, I even used to go to sleep thinking about how I was going to tear the heaad of someone the next day, lol.

      I read Women Who Love Too Much, many moons ago, and can only think we must have been drawn to all that chaos and trauma because of something from our childhoods....... very deep. Of course, it could also have been the simplicity of the board!

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  9. Bell i wasn't made of the strong stuff needed to take the constant bashing some of us got,for a couple of years in my case. Sometimes i would go to bed with almost murderous thoughts in my head directed at the 'boring' blogger and her then friends.
    I in fact could go far enough to say the YGL board and the constant bullying just may have caused my cancer, i say MAY! I would never dwell on it! I wouldnt give them the pleasure of thinking they had that kind of power. Probably good old HRT that did it!
    I do wonder why i spent 5 years on those boards,yes addiction and it wasnt too bad at first was it? Could be pleasant in the early days,but became like an animal farm yep! and i became one in order to retaliate,i became someone i didnt recognise in fact!
    Anyway my life is back to calm again and i dont miss any of those boards at all!
    I see they are causing havoc on the AOL place some have gone to LOL. Funny to pop in and watch ,only now and again though,as i still could feel my hands going around some posters necks.
    I have just bought your book,i havent read a book for quite a while,for obvious reasons,chemo does your brain in! But i will be reading it soon!
    Take care Bell
    Hi RSue and others xx i have left FB if you are wondering where i went!

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    1. Hi Amore and so good to see you here. Your post today has hit a nerve, and I weep for the cruelty inflicted on you, myself and others who became victims of that little gang of cyber thugs.

      Their anti-social behaviour was intolerable by any standards, and I'm actually doing a blog today to highlight the effects their gang bullying had on so many of their victims.

      I wish you love and peace Amore, and I am in awe at your bravery in standing up to those bullies on the YGL and your courage in facing your illness right now. Please stay in touch Amore, you have so many friends who admire and care for you xxx

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  10. Thats very kind of you Bell on all counts xx I still don't quite believe it..the mind can be a wonderful thing at protecting oneself from the awfulness of a situation like this! So i thrive on comedy and black humour..it helps a lot...and the ability to laugh at oneself..oops! thats twice i have said that word..i know the words i want to use tut! xxx

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