Wednesday, 8 June 2016


I think when Gerry and Kate look back on where it all went wrong, they may well find that it was their obsessive hatred of Goncalo Amaral that sealed their fate.  It was not enough for them that Goncalo was forced to give up his long and successful career, Kate wanted him to feel misery and fear. 

So, why didn't Goncalo turn the other cheek?  There is difference between proactively seeking revenge and defending your reputation.  Goncalo Amaral defended himself against the smears and allegations by presenting his side of the story in a factual, well written book.  Those following the abduction story were presented with 'both' sides, and could form whatever opinions they wanted.  However, in the twilight hate filled world of Team McCann,  they demand that only their version of Madeleine's disappearance should be in the public domain, any other must be silenced with calls for imprisonment for those who do not comply.  Not believing the McCanns is officially abusive. 

For the McCanns and their maniacal followers, Goncalo is the Leader of the antis.  All rubbish of course, he keeps a sane arm's length between himself and the likes of Bennett et all.  Nevertheless, his evil, malevolent nature seeps through all those who support him they claim, we must be twisted, mentally unstable and degenerate lowlives because we fail to see what they see. 

What they spectacularly fail to see is the many ways in which they are projecting their own very scary inner turmoil.  The hatred and pichforking comes from them, in fact one of their claims to fame may be the addition of the word 'hater' to the internet lexicon.  They started it!

Whilst the anti side may have more than its' fair share of obsessive stalkers and weirdos, the majority are rational, lucid, ordinary people who simply won't accept the old baloney they are being sold.  Even if the Brenda Leyland publicity stunt had been successful, and several of us were now imprisoned, it still wouldn't convince the public that the McCanns were genuine.  In fact, the result would have been the opposite, there would have been a collective cry of 'WTF!'

That's the problem with maniacal hatred, it causes the loss of all reason and common sense.  How many of us know people who are eaten alive by the problems they are having with their neighbours, their work colleagues, basically whoever they currently blame for the misery that is their lives.  It's not an endearing trait, and any friends left will be near the end of their patience.

I actually went through 5 years of litigation when I took the Catholic Church to Court for the abuse I suffered in their care.  I was determined to confront those who had so badly abused the power they had over the vulnerable children in their care.  But I was wrong.  Five years with a court case hanging over your head is an experience I would not wish on my worst enemy.  It is not a life, it is a living hell, it takes over your every waking moment and pushes you to the edge of insanity.  I was right, dead right, as I sped along, but it was killing me just as if I were wrong. 

Kate and Gerry have had years of libel, all instigated and driven by them, and all of which must be costing them an arm and a leg. They, and indeed everyone around them is waiting for it to be all over, so they can begin living their lives.  They are of course still waiting.  Still paying lawyers, still using their leisure time to plan ways in which to destroy their arch nemesis and still convinced that a 'win' will make them happy.  'What's for dinner mum?' 'Do it yourself sweetcheeks, I've just found evidence Goncalo was caught having a fag behind the bike sheds aged 14.  Got him!'.   

And so it goes on.  The whole point of the McCanns' libel actions against Goncalo Amaral, have long since been forgotten.  If it was to prevent the truth of the Portuguese investigation from getting into the public domain, then that ship has long since sailed.  With the release of the PJ files and video evidence of the EVRD dogs splashed all over the internet, the only one not allowed to discuss the case was the detective who investigated it!  All the facts and details revealed in Goncalo's book have since been published in hundreds of different publications and by hundreds of individuals.  The details of the Portuguese investigation have spread too wide and too far for them ever to be contained again. 
There is nothing left now, but a matter of principle.  Or a matter of spite.  The chances of Kate and Gerry destroying Goncalo and having all their money troubles resolved by a win in the Supreme Court, are remote to nil.  Such is karma, all the hatred they have espoused against Goncalo this past 9 years, has doubled back onto themselves. No-one understands their obsessive hatred of Goncalo, and fewer still want to be part of it.  It has nothing to do with finding Madeleine and it has done nothing to clear their names. 

For most people, police the world over especially, the idea of two former suspects suing the detective who investigated them, is abhorrent.  How can police officers operate if their private homes and future earnings are at risk?  Mr and Mrs McCann seem unaware that true crime is a popular and growing genre especially in high profile cases.  If the ECHR deny Goncalo's right to have an opinion, then the same must apply to every police officer and detective throughout Europe. Criminals will be allowed to say whatever they wish about them, but they will be denied the right to reply. 

Gerry and Kate may be qualified doctors and wooden actors, but they are not very bright if they are allowing their lawyers and advisors to persuade them they can win.  I suspect however, that the will to win, comes not from their advisors, but from their own bloody minds.  Their need to destroy Goncalo overrides every other area of their lives, they are prepared to sacrifice everything, rather than admit defeat. 

If I were among their allies, I would be making arrangements to bail. The hatred that drives Gerry and Kate goes beyond reason and common sense.  They have allowed it to dominate their lives and the lives of all those around them for way too long and scarily they will never stop. 


  1. You are so right Cristobell. I love this blog because you always hit the nail on the head. Anyone who has ever suffered abuse will identify with your views. Whatever the nature of the abuse the victim will wear the scars for a lifetime. The abuser however will have scant regard for their wrong doing, even to the point of denial. The only way the sufferer can escape this nightmare is to step away from the abuse and grow into the person they were meant to be. If that makes sense. Leave the hatred behind, forget the loathing, the sense of injustice and the overwhelming urge to extract revenge at all costs. It won't work. You become consumed and it takes over all your thinking. Life becomes a chore and the people around you suffer.It is an unhealthy state. Many of us have been there. Fortunately most people rationalise that this self destruction serves little purpose other than to leave you bitter and twisted.
    How Kate and Gerry have kept their hatred going for so long is beyond me. Their whole life must be screwed up. It is so liberating to let go. To see the green of the countryside,to smell the flowers and enjoy the smiles on your children's faces. Time for them to give up the battle and heal themselves.

    1. Indeed 00:52, as Star Trek's Spock would say, hatred of another is completely illogical. It is such a negative emotion, it eats you alive.

      I can't say I have ever experienced obsessive hatred myself, I'm more of a shrug my shoulders 'your loss' kinda gal. Even with my own court case, I was half arsed about it, it sickened me if I am honest and I tried to avoid it. I refused to intrude on the lives of those who wanted to forget the convent or to pursue the case vigorously.

      Unfortunately for Gerry and Kate, their lives have been under the microscope for 9+ years, all their rage, anger and seething is caught on celluloid and on the front pages of almost a decade's tabloids. They are Mr and Mrs Angry from Rothley, their scowling, pissed off faces a permanent fixture in the public's eye.

      Laugh and the world laughs with you - but Kate and Gerry dare not laugh, they have trapped themselves in purgatory. They cannot move on from Maddie's tragedy because they must keep up the pretence that she is alive and that they are always looking for her. Their faces are too well known for them to blend into the crowd and they still have a price on their heads with the paparazzi. They cannot be seen to be relaxing and enjoying themselves, effectively, they have built their own miserable prison.

      Where the insanity kicks in, is the transference of their misery onto Goncalo Amaral. They seem to believe that if his life is destroyed, their lives will be fixed. In many ways, Kate and Gerry are almost childlike in their emotional development, they are still going with what worked for them when they were 5. They are each the 'good' child, they do what they are told, so it must be everyone else's fault. Gerry can't hide the 'brat' and Kate can't hide the 'little madam'.

      Their hatred of Goncalo is now torpedoing them to destruction. They are waving the Rules and Regulations as a reminder to all their critics, but no-one is taking any notice. Like every jobsworth, they are using the 'Rules' to be obnoxious and appealing to fellow model citizens to back them up.

      What they fail to understand, is that the world has evolved in leaps and bounds since the old pistols at dawn and gentleman's honour days of old. If you are in the public eye, or even if you just use social media, you will have idiots online calling you names and saying nasty things about you. If you can't handle it, you don't need a lawyer, you need to work on your own self esteem.

      That was a generic 'me on a soapbox' moment there btw. I agree wholeheartedly with your final paragraph 00:52, in this complicated world we often forget that the sole purpose in life is to be happy. For most of us that happiness comes from making other people happy. It's why we spend hours choosing the perfect gift, cooking what THEY love, and standing in a queue to watch the latest Superhero film when the latest 'Despicable Me' movie is on next door.

      For me today, it is walking in the rain. Crazy I know, but I have never been able to resist it!

    2. It's "exact revenge" not "extract".

  2. Has anyone read the full version of The Count of Monte Cristo?

    “Fool that I am," said he, "that I did not tear out my heart the day I resolved to revenge myself".”

    1. Another great one highmyope, thank you.

      I once had a book entitled 'The best form of revenge is live well'. Nothing pees off those who hate you more than the fact that you care nothing about them. The opposite of love is not hatred, it is indifference.

      I am really struggling to find a reason behind this almost maniacal hatred the McCanns feel for Goncalo. It is absurd to believe that they would have got away with everything if hadn't been for ONE detective. Suspicion as to the parents involvement began within days. My dear old mum knew straight away, their story was unbelievable in the truest sense of the word.

      To be honest the passion in that hatred has me stumped, and if anyone can explain it, it would be much appreciated.

    2. Sorry did I read that correctly 'they would have got away with everything if it hadn't been for one detective' got away with what exactly? That is the problem with you, you believe everything that Amaral has said, when in fact nothing at all was proven and there was no evidence to back up that Madeleine died in 5a. The Portuguese police are working with SY they came up with tractor man theory so don't think they are following Amaral's theory do you?

      By the way the McCann's did not cause Amaral to lose his job, it was his own doing, he was angry that he was asked to follow other leads and he wanted to stick to his own. His choice of words got him slung out of the case, it was his decision to leave the Police and write his book, which in my opinion is libellous, accusing parents of drugging their child and hiding her dead body. Now if someone wrote a book like that about you would you do nothing? Amaral more or less told the world Madeleine was dead, so people would stop searching for her, Madeleine deserves better than that.

    3. Is that the story you are going with?

      As much as I am a huge admirer of Dr. Amaral, I have read extensively on this case, my opinion on this case didn't begin with the book of Goncalo, it was formed long before that. It was then confirmed by the official police files and the truthful account of Dr. Amaral.

      What would they have got away with? Wow, where do I begin. Apart from the annual 'Madeleine Day' and the growth of the Fund to a giant corporation and people imprisoned for criticising them, where do I begin? The Disneyesque world of the McCanns sends shudders through me.

      The official story btw, was that Amaral was criticising British police, not refusing to follow other leads.

      I don't believe his book is libellous. Every story has two sides, why should only one be available? We are all free to defend ourselves with the written word, it's the only non physically harmful way of challenging allegations against us. That one party should be deprived of this freedom should be abhorrent to everyone.

      If someone wrote a book about me, I'd be very flattered indeed! I honestly couldn't care less what my enemies say about me (apart from when they are writing nasty reviews to scupper my books), because whatever they say is totally contrary to my character and my writing. I am not the spiteful, twisted old hag, spitting vitriol that they describe. Very, very, far from it, lol!

      I've never pretended to be a clean living, non substance abusing church goer and my life is littered with the mistakes I have made. But so what? I have long since forgiven myself for any and all transgressions, and in retrospect, I wish there had been a few more.

      As for even more heinous accusations, again, they wouldn't bother me a jot because I know they are not true. I was once asked how I would feel if someone accused me of being a paedophile. I said it wouldn't trouble me at all because I'm not. It brought the conversation to a very swift end.


      As for 'searching', this is becoming ridiculous now. What are the public supposed to be searching for? The face of a generic shop window dummy in a crowd? A 13 year old girl who doesn't quite fit in with her family? Should we be spying on our neighbours - families having days out? Should dentists worldwide check the records of 13 year old girls? Should A&E departments and GPs be on constant alert?

      Who do you think is still searching? More importantly, who do you think stopped searching after the publication of Goncalo's book?

      The problem Kate and Gerry had was that the POLICE stopped searching. When the PJ shelved their file, they were not looking for any other suspects. They had followed every likely abduction lead and all their lines of enquiry were exhausted. That's what happens when suspects (especially those with good lawyers)refuse to co-operate. The Madeleine case is very far from unique!

      It wasn't Amaral who told the world Madeleine was dead, it was the alerts of the dogs and Kate and Gerry being made suspects.

      You are not doing Kate and Gerry any favours at all by continuing to place all the blame on Goncalo Amaral. He was the co-ordinator of a team, and they were all in agreement. Even the British police who recommended that the cadaver and blood dogs be brought in. Nine years on, no other 'team' has come up with a more plausible explanation. As for 'tractor man' - seriously? That explanation would embarrass not only Operation Grange, but the entire UK.

  3. Ros - is a transcript/court report of your action against the catholic Church available online? I would be very interested in reading it.

    1. There might well be 17:26. It was a 3 day trial in Leeds and everything was recorded I imagine it probably is available on request.

      I was in the witness box for one and a half days, and everyone, including the Judge, was writing down every word. The interrogation was brutal, the Church and Local Authority were defending the abuse in the convent by accusing my parents of being cruel and reckless and portraying as the nuns and perverts as our rescuers.

      They had nothing to attack me with personally, I have no criminal record and two eminent psychiatrists (one for their side, one for mine) agreed that I was not liar. Therefore they focussed their attacks on my parents. They 'put it to me' that my mother never loved me and I must accept it!

      Their line of questioning offended me on every level, but it had the opposite effect of what they intended. I defended my beloved mum and dad vigorously, and have done ever since.


    2. My best friend, Big Lynn and I, spent each night of the trial in a hotel room going through bundles of photo albums, and as I looked for evidence to defend my mum and dad, I was overwhelmed with nothing but happy memories. It wasn't my parents who fucked up my life, it wasn't even the convent, but I'll save that for another day!

      Significantly, I began to see how cruel it was of the 'authorities' who seize children, place them in care and then indoctrinate them to 'hate' their parents and the background they come from. So many families were torn apart by this evil ideology, and so many kids were thrown out into the world at the age of 16 with literally no-one to turn to. I know of two lovely ladies who did not find out until they were in their forties, that they had family who loved and wanted to care for them in Ireland!

      But back to the trial. I have an official diagnosis of multiple personal disorder! And apparently whilst in the witness box, I physically transformed under questioning! That is, my appearance changed entirely during a particularly nasty line of questioning - a bit like the Hulk. Apparently, my skin went white and I stood upright with my head high as a new, previously unseen, character took over. I have to say I did experience a strange dis-association, where the voice I could hear didn't appear to be mine. It was spooky, but I'm not convinced. I think I just found that inner strength that most of us don't even know we have until we are in crisis.

  4. Much as I hate to be bitchy, I find it hilarious that CMoMM with 83 million hits has had the same boring top thread for at least a week. The same boring people discussing the same minute details as they were 6/7 years ago. The world moves on, but that little gang of diehards are still there!

    1. what a strange thing to say Ros - you have been "on the case" for 9 years and you haven't moved on.

    2. Same case, but there the similarity ends. Bennett et al are still looking for clues that Gerry and Kate are involved - I passed that stage many years ago.

      It's like HideHo's insistence that her facebook group discuss ONLY the PJ files and nothing else, the discussion is restricted and contained.

      None of them are looking at the bigger picture and the wider implications because they are still focussed on the minutiae, the shutters and the discrepancies in the statements, ie. the same and only subjects they have been discussing for the past 7 years. They are caught in a timewarp.

    3. No Ros - look carefully at what they are doing - they are looking at every statement that shows Madeleine was alive on Thursday and trying to rubbish it. The only way their obnoxious theories work is for Madeleine either to have not been there at all that week or to have "died" on Sunday. (whilst her parents continued quite normally to enjoy the rest of their holiday)

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  5. "aquila Today at 20:09

    When you consider that religions such as Islam which advocates flooding the world with babies - and call me a bitch if you will but why in God's name do Muslim women on boats, fleeing their countries, the countries where their men won't fight for them, continue to get pregnant by these dreadful men...and they come here."

    A kind caring soul on bennett's Islam hating site.

    1. The racism on Bennett's site is chilling, Aquila is no better than a chavvy Britain First thug who spends her days weeping over her halal turkey and polishing up her knuckledusters. I wouldn't spit on her if she was on fire.

    2. I quite like aquila. I've known her for years and she's anything but spiteful.

  6. Oh I see bennett has posted the fuck off reply to his incredibly unsuccessful petition.