Thursday, 3 May 2012


My shoulder pain has now spread to the other one.  I have already informed my doctor, that she has got it all wrong, I doubt very much I have plain old osteoarthritis, its bound be rheumatoid, lupus, or psoriasis arthritis, and I am going to end up hideously deformed.  Stop chuckling my hidden admirers, lol.

I daren't look up 'will I get a hunchback' and an elongated nose on google, because I don't really want to know the answer.  I already have the cackle.  I can already see a future of shopping online and frightening small children.  I am sort of making a list in my head of the pluses and minuses.   

Far from being ashamed, I am telling everyone, complete strangers, and I am becoming very much acquainted with a lovely pair of old Irish sisters, who love nothing better than having a natter and a fag, and go on about the terrible pain that comes with it.  We always end up giggling. 

Arthritis, has its pluses.  It is great for getting out of making a cup of tea and it is a card you can pull at any opportune moment.  Telling people, you are too  damm drunk, or off your head, never illicits much sympthy.  Whereas, arthritis can be googled by anyone and the accompanying pain is proven.  I should have asked for a copy of the x-ray, to be produced when I want to suggest a take-a-way.  Being a drama queen has its downside.

I am definitely becoming more and more like my mother (still think I am possessed),and loving the excuse to boss people around, can't reach, don't feel like it, etc, can all be directly attributed to it.  I strongly suspected she had me pushing her around in a wheelchair for the hell of it.  It was a whole power trip, and she was loving it, she even called me Jeeves, and would keep her walking stick handy, in case any mere mortals in Morrisons, didn't make way for her.  Have you ever tried to manoevre a wheelchair with a trolley attached through a crowded supermarket while said invalid is sitting comfortably, chuckling her head off, and shouting 'I want that one, I want that one' whilst waiving a walking aid as a dangerous weapon.  I always expected to be pounced upon by a swat team of swarthy he-men dressed in black, whenever we went shopping.  Or the swat team may have been part of another daydream, but lets not go there...........   its 1.15am

Alas, it is only a dream, what with my arthritis!  I would be OK with a guy who was good company, but couldn't be doing with all that 'how's your father' and definitely no more ironing shirts for anyone who is not a blood relative.  I also have a proviso, that says, 'former revolutionaries preferred, and if they look and sound a bit like Antonio Banderas, can play the banjo and enjoys discussing politics.  In the event of none of the above applying, no objection to smoking will do.  I may have a future where I will have to be filmed from behind a screen, and past the watershed.  I can't afford to be too choosy.  On the plus side, I could let Disney know I will shortly be available for 'witch' parts, with minimum make up required.  I really must stop googling diseases.    

I actually had a friend fall asleep on me the other night, but I carried on talking regardless.  My son was giggling away, and said I was like one of those strange people at parties who carry on talking to the comatose.  Cheeky Sod!  He said I bet you won't put that in your blog!  Best say, nite, nite,  


  1. I feel for you.
    Check out Today's program covered cooking with natural ingredients that combat arthritis. Avoid alcohol, red meat and very spicy food, but drink just a little unpasteurized apple cider vinegar before each meal.
    Good luck.
    Art H. Ritis (Esq)

    1. Many thanks for your reply. Alcohol is a small, once a week treat these days, mostly because I can't handle the hangovers. However, I think if I were let loose, I would be downing glasses of Chablis with Jack Daniels' chasers.

      I will check out the link.


    You don't have to let aching joints, stiffness and limited mobility spoil even ONE MORE DAY of your life.
    Discover the latest treatments and medications to help you manage your arthritis.

    The 2012 Johns Hopkins Arthritis White Paper

    Your Arthritis Experts
    John A. Flynn, M.D.
    D. William Schlott Professor of Clinical Medicine
    Clinical Director of General Internal Medicine
    Johns Hopkins University School of Medicine
    Carl A. Johnson, M.D.
    Associate Professor of Orthopaedic Surgery
    Johns Hopkins University School of Medicine
    Medical Director of Johns Hopkins Orthopaedics at White Marsh

    When you have arthritis, each day brings new challenges. That's just part of what makes it such a difficult disease to manage.

    Rheumatoid arthritis
    Ankylosing spondylitis
    Lyme disease

    1. Many thanks for your links. I seem to be struggling to find the right information, but maybe I am just googling the wrong words.

      All the information on osteoarthritis points to a slow progression. It feels has spread to every joint within days, weeks. And on top of that as a certified headcase, I don't know if the symptoms are psychosomotic?

      I am not too alarmed, I gave up dreaming of being a ballerina, when I could no longer paint my toenails, so I am used to disappointment.

  3. Bell good advise re the cider vinigar try it.. also Bell please look up touch points on the internet if you can send for the book even better.. if you think you have over 200 mucsles in the body then you know that they need some care sometimes.. dont give up and dont think painkillers will make it go away.. do something positive to help your body heal.. I have been there and have to say your GP wont give you the help.. you have to go for alternative medicine.. get to know your body and how to help it.. touch points is amazing and you can do it at home.. and see how 15 mins a day will help you.. something as simple as a tennis ball will help you but you have to read the book or.. what they let you see on the internet.. good luck Bell.. I feel for you and do know what you are going through.. ((Bell))

    1. Many thanks for your kind advice Sue. I feel guilty discussing it on my blog, because I continue to get hate mail saying 'its all about you', and those are the nicer ones, lol.

      I discuss my own life, my aches and pains, my excessive love of maltesers, alcohol and all things bad etc, and those that hate me so intensely have issues within themselves, that I can't be arsed to psychoanalys at this time.

      I speak truthfully, I cannot tell a lie, quite literally, I am crap at it. From the moment the woman in the sweet shop screamed 'did you nick a sweet when my back was turned?' and I foolishly went bright red and answered 'yes', I knew from then on, I was doomed on the whole lying front. However, I got away with obligatory thrashing on the hand with a ruler by the local bobby, because I was the only one honest enough to tell the truth. On that occasion, my catholicism, paid off.

      I'm only feeling sorry for myself Sue, but I sort of know that there are others reading who recognise and empathise, and enjoy a giggle. My list of pluses, is coming along nicely, and I feel I have the power to overcome it.

      I have not taken my tablets today, had a long walk with the bubble, which was hilarious. We are as decriped as each other, I take along a tennis ball, and I can't throw it, and he can't see it, so mostly, it's just hunt the ball.

      Still don't know if you should take them like antibiotics, ie, complete the course, or when needed? Dont intend to continue with all the pill popping though, they zombify me, and I keep imagining all sorts of conspiracy theories..........