UPDATE - HAPPY CHRISTMAS
I deliberately sought out an inspirational Christmas message, for myself as much as for my loyal readers. Not so sure about the 'tenderness for the past' bit especially, I doubt I will ever forgive all those who voted Conservative, and I will never learn to accept and live with the rise of far right ideology. For now I am broken, more accurately, trying to recover from a broken dream with Python Lee Jackson singing in the background.
I have dipped a toe in politics many times over the years, well on and off, more off than on to be honest, because I don't have the emotional constitution to deal with defeat. My heart breaks for Jeremy Corbyn, no one could have done more. But sadly, Jeremy rose up at a time when we are all used to the instant gratification that our capitalist world brings, and those with all the goodies can play us however they want. The masses, given an opportunity to create a more equal society, rejected it. Something I will never understand.
But, tis the season to be jolly, and it's compulsory. We can't put it off for a couple of months, or pretend it isn't happening. And that's probably a good thing, it brings people together and reminds us of how much good there is in the people and the communities all around us. For a couple of weeks at least, we can allow ourselves to be happy, we can take time off from worrying about the things that stress us in the other 50 weeks of the year. Our priorities change, the right present, the most succulent turkey, the booziest Christmas pudding, matter more than the bills piling up and the job going nowhere.
Broken dream or no, it is impossible not to be uplifted by the prospect of a brand new year, I'm still not focused, but at least one path is now closed off. I will leave politics to those with the backbone and tenacity to rise up again and again, they are much stronger than I. I shall return to my roots, and from now on, will only insert my politics, via subtext. Maybe not as subtle I think, ha ha, I managed to send at least 3 forums into a frenzy.
But I am genuinely looking forward to the new year and a new start. I accept that I am powerless to change the world around me, I can only change myself. That's a bit of a mantra I have been chanting these past few years, and it usually works. The hardest part is accepting I can't change things. That unfortunately has been leitmotif throughout my life. I'm still the 5 year old girl who believes she can do anything and being told I can't hurts just as bad. Getting to the acceptance part can be eased by Buddhist quotes a bottle of wine and songs by Patsy Cline.
Which brings me nicely back to the Season of Giving. It is the 'giving' that makes us feel good and that is a very strange, alien, feeling for the tight fisted and the hard of heart. They are not used to it, but they like it, as long as it has the proviso of 'for a limited time only'. But fear not brave readers, who have stuck it thus far, I am not going to ask you for anything financial or anything that will take up your time. All I am asking that you give, is a warm smile and maybe a kind word to all the strangers that you meet, especially to immigrants who now face such uncertain times. Most of us are, I think, descended from parents, grandparents and ancestors who arrived on these shores similarly, as strangers. Let's give them the helping hand our forbears received, from some, at least. Let their memories and stories for their grandchildren be filled with the kindness of their neighbours.
Ok, ok, on reflection, it would appear I have overdosed on feel good Christmas movies. Tis true. I have been unwell (missed my flu Jab) and have been incapacitated, though still managing the full red carpet look, one must make an effort. I'm hoping, should I end up on a machine, a kindly nurse will apply the Clinique lipstick, around the ventilator. But I digress, I have been captivated by the number of ordinary American girls who take a vacation in Europe and meet a genuine Prince! None of whom have the Hapsburg 'jaw' or the Windsor 'ears', happily. The princes, not the girls. The girls of course, are clean living, family loving non gold diggers, who also enjoy country walks on vast estates, riding horses, wearing tiaras and saying up yours to all the mean girls when they move into a castle. The plots are crazy, but they kind of work. You can see what's coming, but they always end with sumptuous feasts, fabulous fireside Christmas settings and spectacular snow scenes - what's not to like? I do lean more towards Christmas films with dogs in, but that's just personal choice, for me, 'Hotel for Dogs' was a classic, right up there with Citizen Kane and Raging Bull.
I jest of course, but my ask that you give is quite sincere. It takes guts, ambition, determination and hard work to start anew in a foreign land. Immigrants are seeking opportunity, and thank heavens they are, because our high streets would be desolate without them. A warm smile and a kind word costs nothing but it can lift the spirits of someone who has been treated, shall we say, not so kindly. The foreign people in our midst are people just as we are, we all share the same love of family, the same hopes and the same dreams. I am devastated by the election result, as I am sure I have made clear, but my pain is nothing, compared to the pain that must be felt by all those 'strangers' who have made England their home. But I, we, still have power in that we can show those who would be ostracised that we stand with them and beside them and always will. We are a multicultural society, and that is something to celebrate this Christmas. With all its sham, drudgery and broken dreams, it is still a beautiful world. Be cheerful. Strive to be happy.
Ps. To anyone who cares, I have long forgotten and forgiven (probably because I've forgotten) the rants and raves against me over the years. I don't think I have ever taken it personally to be honest, let's just say, as a bit of an err, outsider, it is something I have been accustomed too my entire life. When my family introduce me they always proffer an apology before I open my mouth, hoping perhaps to avoid explanations later (coy smiley). I don't know what it is about me that incites such hostility, lol, but whatever it is, I've never been arsed to sort it out and not likely to now.
To be honest, I quite enjoyed the detailed psychoanalysis of my 'disturbed' mind, by such luminaries as tigger, Verdi, bennett and the sociopaths in the cesspit and myths' forums. Flattered actually, that I occupied their heads for so long, ha ha. But to be fair, even though their main subject was 'me', even I got bored with it. They are a zillion ways in which to insult someone, they found about 5 and put them on a repetitive cycle. Not once, you slimey b'stads did you put up someone capable of taking me on with the much mightier than a sword, pen. Yes, I have indeed, drunk an entire bottle of wine and off to throw up.
Pps. With my Christmas fairy wand, I absolve you all, hic. Times, circumstances, waves of opinion, the 'zeitgeist' can carry people off in all sorts of bizarre directions. Not because they are bad people, but because they have made a judgment based on majority opinion, even if it runs contrary to their own. They believe the 'majority' knows better than they do, as an individual and they don't have the confidence to assert their opinion. It is far, far easier to take the road well travelled, the one the majority takes. Maybe it will be the right one, maybe it will never come back to haunt you, but if you follow your instincts and your own moral guidelines, you will never have those fears, you will never have any explaining to do. Honesty and Integrity works every time.